I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
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