farters have to be the big spoon...
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You know, be my cock's hype man.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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