The maid of honor just puked.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
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at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
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Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
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