Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
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I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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