Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
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