I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
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