Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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