A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
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No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
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In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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