hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize