laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize