i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
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I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
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I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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