Non-Jews are for practice
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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