Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're like a gay fantastic four
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
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