It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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