Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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