What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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