So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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