im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
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