She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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