Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
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It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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