your parents love me but you hate me
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize