He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize