Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
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He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
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I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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