The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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