While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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