She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
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I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
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Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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