Fuck appropriateness.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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