I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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