her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Welp...herpes.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
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Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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