I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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