She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
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I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
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lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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