meet me or not, i'm out of control
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
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