its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
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