you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize