At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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