Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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