woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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