Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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