he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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