I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
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