I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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