Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize