I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
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He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
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I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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