To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
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They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
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I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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