my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize