So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize