she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
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We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
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He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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