Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I am naked and annoyed.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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