so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
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