At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
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